Four things you are greatfull for

On SARA IN LALALAND, question of the 5 she asked this ” what are for  things your greatfull for “.

I felt like elaborating on this more just because I’m in that kind of a mood.

The answer’s I gave was this,

1.WordPress and all the beautiful people iv meat on here.

2. All the real beautiful people iv meat on the streets.

3. All the beauty and wonder in the world.

4. All the people I have meat from around the world in the past 5+ years and was able to help in some small way.

As you can see I didn’t say anything about my life because in reality my life really doesn’t mean a thing to me it’s all about what I can do for others even at the cost of my own life. Now don’t get me wrong here I don’t have a death wish any more but I live by a code of honer and if that means giving up my life to save someone else well then so be it.

I broke my rose colored glasses 5+ years ago after my awakening my selfishness to end my life was replaced with a need to help other’s and in doing so it help me to grow and fix my self making me a better person for it.

I walk the streets and am discusted by the trashy mess I see every wear but with in the trash I can see the wonder of life still thriving to exist refusing to die.

As I walk the streets I see the faces of the people of this world, some you can read like a billboard their hole life’s story written on their face others aren’t that easy to read and some are just plain scary.  You see the really poor and the poor alike in the grocery store try to pay for what they can to provide for their families, you see the addicts on the street corners panhandling to get money for their next fix because they have given up and know no other way to live.

When you break your rose colored glasses the world becomes a hole nother place and you become a different person in it!!!


Life won’t give me a break

Well a couple of month’s ago i left the hell hole i was in to try and start over agine to make a better life for my self and start to transition. Well like everything Life had a different idea, iv looked and applied for job’s that i thought i could physically do as im disabled but to no avale.  Now im unemployed, brock and homeless, iv tryed to be happy and motivated pusing me self way out side me comforte zone and my anxiety level.

Now im just F’ed !!!