Sorry everyone but this will probably be my last post for a while ( see my last post for the details ).
Now I’m just gonna ramble on about my life abit.
I’ve never had a easy life that’s for sure as a child I had a rare growth disorder were my bone structure grow twice as fast as the rest of my body causing severe pain in my muscles as they were stretched to their bracking point everyday and to add to that I was diagnosed with scolyowses so I had to go to physical therapy 3 days a week and I was diagnosed with cronic degradation of the ear drums and I had a birth defect in my reproductive organs, so my childhood was mostly spent in pain and getting shofold around from doctor to doctor being pocked and prodded and in and out of the hospital for ear surgery and stiches for severe cuts ( cosd by many different things ) and my teenage years into adolthood was about the same in and out of the hospital for something or another, I brock my tail bone in my early twenties and some how herniated 3 discs in my lower back around the same time but I don’t slow down I went full tilt into reclise abandonement of my body, now at 44 year’s old I have a bulging disc in the middle of my back, my right shoulder is messed up, I have a couple of ribs on the left side messed up, my right hip is messed up, my right knee is messed up and I have a nurological problem with my right leg making it hard to walk right, I’m half def, my eyes are gone bad and I have swelling in my lower legs making it hard to crotch-down, so I’m no stranger to physical pain but it’s to much to beable to work throw any more doing physical labor, now add on top of that my depression and anxiety and you have one “F”ed up life.
Everywhere I go to try and get help I get the same basic reaction of ” OMG your disabled “sorry we can’t help you”, iv been doing this for years now gone around and around with the brocken system we have if you’re disabled and poor there’s no help for you your on your own and the same goes for if you’re homeless around here and the city has made sure to make it as hard as possible on you to just survive as they don’t want homeless people around.
I’m not trying to wine and complain here but make a point that this is my “F”ed up life and this is what I have to deal with, I don’t blame anyone for it I’m the one that wasted my 20’s and 30’s in suicidal depression and anxiety working under the table for a couple of chep ass’s and getting nowere in life. I’ve spent the last 5 year’s trying to fix my brocken life and get past my depression and anxiety witch I thought I had for the most part but it’s pulling me back down again with all that is going on now in my life.
If you’ve read throw all this thank you for your time.
❤️ ✌️ BY FOR NOW